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I… am a hardcore feminist and I stand up for myself and every women who needs a voice or a hand across. But, today here are a few things which I have heard from men in India who are definitely feeling a separate feeling from what they should do. From hearing what these men are feeling, I definitely have a few things to clear off. Feminism means to protect the oppressed female but not oppressing or putting every other man in a crime court. NO! That is not Feminism.
In this country, feminism is becoming an act of ‘Gundagardi’ and a wonderful blame game which is not enjoyable to watch at all. The punishable is definitely guilty no matter what, but punishing the whole other sect of gender is not the motto of feminism. Without judging or without looking at them as a prospect culprit all the time. That will lead to another story eventually. And ladies here are a few things this time, you have to hear. It is necessary that you come out of your own judgmental state of mind:
1. Women are not the only ones who are abused:
We definitely need to make our country more secure for women, it is the most important things to do but at what cost? Every problem of a women is being speculated under a microscope, giving all the sympathy required; whereas a man’s problem isn’t. There are crimes which occur every day in this country against men as well, so what about that? We really need to think about that as well.
2. If taking Dowry is wrong; then so is the alimony:
Laws are biased as well! Ladies get so many protection from the law, but what about the wrong doings against men and unnecessary alimony? Which just takes away everything away from them for which they worked really hard! For real victims yes, I do agree to give them help in a financial way. But if you want her to feel empowered; then grabbing and snatching a man’s life earning isn’t the way.
3. They are abused and harassed as well:
The laws favoring the female rape victims are quiet well aware off. These laws have made a horror for a common man’s everyday life. The amount of information that has been spread around is becoming more useful for the ladies who are actually thugs and they use it to get all the money from the innocent men who really don’t mean harm to ladies. If you believe in Feminism help everyone who needs a support be it a woman or a man.
4. Yes, I am a man; but I don’t mean any harm to you:
There are men who really believe in protecting the women of our country. And they are everywhere around you, just like there are bad ones. But you can always make out the difference between the people, who just gorge their eyes out in your soul as if they are scanning you up with the ones; who just love minding their own business! So, just stop judging every single man as a molester or a rapist. That is why you should believe in your self and just be vigilant for the ones who really are creepy.
5. You want choices? They have some too:
If I say that men are not acknowledged much in this country, then I am not just bluffing. Before we women even think about having a relationship, we get on to check what do they do? How well they dress? Which company they work for? Not every girl is like that but again, there are good and bad in every sect. If women are being objectified, so are the men. Ladies, will you genuinely go and just talk to a guy who is absolutely dressed casually and doesn’t really believe in putting up a show? That’s what I thought!
6. At least try to own up your share of responsibility:
Ladies! How many times, have you paid your bills yourself or your share of the date? How many times have you offered your reserved bus seat to an elderly man or a man who is in need? How many times have you opened your own can door for yourself and pulled your own chair to sit still being a lady? If you believe in equality as a feminist, then let’s give the equality completely. Equality is 50/50 not 60/40 or 70/30. There is a difference between standing up for yourself and being the one who just throws people down the line.
7. True feminists will know the actual problem:
If you are a true feminist, then you should be the one standing against the patriarchy not every single man in general. Being feminist doesn’t mean you become spiteful towards your life and the one who share it with you. Not just your life partner, your father, your brothers, your other sisters and so on. Fight the ideology that makes you a weaker sect not the men in general. Patriarchy was born with men and women combined together. No taali with one hand!
8. Some like Chicken and some like Mutton – doesn’t really matter:
Last but never the least, I have seen every one making a casual joke on internet or a public forum that goes up and steers up a curse storm. If you are a feminist be a little open to some light heart conversation. Don’t just go bite in the ass right there! If a man says that he likes a skinny girl over a fuller ones, then so be it. How many of you liked a gullible, chubby, cute and nerdy guy? Tall, dark, handsome is always on your list, right? You can have all the opinions about everything and everyone but don’t be the destruction machine when a man has an opinion too. Come on, not everyone will like the same kind of Biryani!